Amazed & Confused

Guts, gore, law and bore: seeing love in the OT

On Sunday I tackled one of my most challenging talk briefs to date: God's love in the Old Testament. When I received the talk brief from Dan I got terribly excited; partly because of the challenge (30 minutes - 30-odd books what do you focus on!), but mostly because the OT is the part of God's word I've been on the biggest journey with.

I used to dread reading it; honestly, I thought it was something to be endured until you reached the good bit (Jesus).  When I actually did read it I discovered some absolutely gorgeous bits that I would then read repeatedly: Psalms, Proverbs, adventures and amazing role models. If I'm honest I would skip past or skim read the guts, gore, law and all the stuff that bored me. It was difficult to understand, almost alien in it's worldview. It wasn't until I read the Bible using the God Story technique that I started to see the grand sweep of God's love and intention, from the moment of creation to the growth of the early church.  It was from that nine months of reading and studying that my love for the Old Testament grew.  

Much study, thought, prayer and discussion went into capturing some of that journey for Sunday's talk.  If you're interested in the outcome then you can download it here: 

 

Download God's Love in the Old Testament

 

(The sound goes a little odd two minutes in but is swiftly fixed by the wonderous Malc Garda.)

Studying and preparing for this talk has crystalised the journey of learning and teaching (and learning about teaching) I've been on for the last four years.  On one hand I can see how far I've come.  On the other, I am always accutely aware of how much more I have to learn.  

I haven't been to Bible college, I don't have any formal training but I do love learning and have been searching for good resources to really stretch me in the area of preaching and teaching.  My good friend Wendy Andrews and I were skyping recently sharing our studying and speaking journies and swapping recommendations for resources and mentoring.  It was when we were listing what's really helped us that I realised:

1. Interested mentors have been one of the most helpful things in my journey (Pete Greig and Ellie Armstrong particularly)
2. We're hungry for teaching and resource on the art of communication and preaching but don't know where to find them (I have listened to Rob Bell, John Ortberg and Mark Driscoll on the topic, read the odd book and the like but what else is out there that you don't have to go to college to get?)
3. We don't know of any women teaching about teaching.  We know female teachers, but haven't heard them on this topic - anyone recommend any?  Is Danielle Strickland, Elaine Storkey or anyone else wading in and shaping young, studying women?

So dear blogasphere, does anyone have any recommendations?!  If you study and preach, what's helped and shaped you?  Who are the people, what are the resources and rhythms you've developed that have most grown you as a speaker?  Let's share the learning wealth, I for one would be most greatful :)

Bourne Legacy: I was sceptical but they may have just won me over...

 

To put my cards on the table I should confess that up until now I have been rather sceptical about this reboot / offshoot of the Bourne series.  What's a Bourne film without Jason Bourne!?!  Hand held cameras?  Dangerous Beurocrats?  Matt Damon's still waters run deep and deadly performance has kept me gripped through three films.  Despite my misgivings I knew in my heart of hearts that I'd probably go see it.  I'd see it because it's inspired by a trilogy that has reimagined the spy film in a spectacular way.  

I was never greatly enamoured with Bond (don't shoot me I know everyone else loves him but I can't get past the womanising - it's not attractive). 

I love Bourne. 

I love the characters, the plots, the conspiracies, the naturalistic and underplayed approach to drama, the action and fighting style. After watching the trailer above I'm wondering if much of this may still be present accounted for even if our beloved Jason is missing.  Take a look, tell me what you think...

40 days, 5 minutes, 1 Gospel...

 

8 planes, 8 faces and four nations; that's what will have gone into this video prayer podcast when we wrap in a few weeks.  This season of 24-7 Spaces seems the most exciting yet with people I love, leading us in prayer a week at a time through the Gospel of John.  I've been so tied up in helping make this happen it's bizzare that it's come round for release already!  If you're interested and want to know more then click play and find out what Pete Greig (England), Tash Creaney (Northern Ireland), Ralf Neumann (Germany), Brian Heasley (Ibiza), Adam Cox, Jon Petersen and Joe Steinke (USA)... and me too... will be talking and praying about this lent. 

Freezing my nose off to help thousands pray

Travel has been my watch-word for the last two weeks with retreats, prayer weekends, trips to Northern Ireland and now Germany taking me away from home and off into the big wide world.

It's been challenging, exciting, refreshing, tiring, inspiring, fun, thought provoking and much more to be away with lovely people in interesting places.  I'm looking forward to this little splurge of travel coming to an end tomorrow night as I fly back home to my waiting hubby and get my teeth stuck into all the work that's been awaiting my return.

The last trip in my schedule is to somewhere new.  Today I fly from Gatwick and arrive in Berlin!  Though I've been to Germany many times I have never landed in it's capitol city and though I only get to drive through it, I look forward to waving hello through a car window.  From Berlin airport Chris Stone and I will drive to Neubrandenberg for 24 packed hours with the great Ralf Neumman.  This rather brief jaunt is to film Ralf's contribution to the upcoming 24-7 Spaces podcast; a 40 day video podcast that helps anyone interested in praying through the life of Jesus in the gospel of John this lent.  So far the contributions people have made have been inspiring!  I can't wait for it to begin.

However... if passion is determined by how much you are willing to suffer for something you love then I must be passionate about Spaces.  I got a text today informing me that it's currently -16 in Neubrandenberg!!!  What!?!  We are totally going to freeze our noses off filming outside in the Datzberg.  Oh well shoud be fun.  If frost bite has spared my fingers I shall blog about it upon my return.  Here's to a new city! 

Is my Dad going to be OK? Please say yes...

The title of this post was a real prayer, found in a prayer space... Few things move me more than honest encounters with God.  In 24-7 Prayer Rooms and Spaces in churches, workplaces, prisons, community hubs and schools, people poor out what they really think, what they really want, how they actually feel deep down where no-one else can see.  Sometimes it spills out into an artistic explosion, other times a simple prayer or question... but if all I do with my life is walk with and encourage communities making space for this, I'll die a happy woman.

As this movement continues to... well... move... a new swell has emerged in the ordinary schools of our nation.  Prayer Spaces in Schools began only a few years ago yet they've spread like a wild fire across the UK & Ireland.  These creative, holy spaces in hosted in primary and secondary schools for a day or week, provide space for a generation to encounter a living and interested God.  We ran two here in Chichester and both times I was floored by the truth, questioning and genuine response evident on the walls / cargo nets / paint spaces / crosses.  It was messy, uncertain, unfinished and absolutely gorgeous. 

It's also spreading...

There's been interest from a few different nations about taking prayer spaces to schools but one that has just run with it is Uganda.  Yesterday I heard that a group of schools are joining together to host spaces back to back filling the academic year in 2012!  A generation, praying through the academic year.  Amazing!  

Yesterday the teaser film for the new Prayer Spaces in Schools video was released in the UK.  Take a look and let us know what you think... Could this be something for your local schools?

Prayer Spaces in Schools Teaser from Prayer Spaces In Schools on Vimeo.

 

Moments captured in the aperture of the mind

Today I opened a new journal... I'd set aside the practice last summer but it's been calling to me so I return to it again.  There's a lot happening right now.  Lots on my mind.  Good things, great things, things to make decisions about.  I don't want to lose the big picture so have turned to marking pages with streams of conscious to capture every aspect of what lies ahead.  It gave me peace...

Often I marvel at where God/life/choices have taken me.  As I emailed a 24-7 Prayer Room in the Dominican Republic I stopped to wonder how on earth we became connected.  Where did they find out about 24-7 Prayer?  What made them pray?  This movement never stops moving :)

The photo above was a beautiful moment in a rather hectic week.  Chris (the camera man), Scot (taking the photo) and I found ourselves on West Witterings beach at sunset.  We were filming an episode of the 24-7 Spaces podcast for this lent.  The bleak vista and an amazing passage from John combined to make the moment beautiful.  How did I end up there?  How come I get to do this?  I am so grateful.

If I don't capture these moments in the aperture of my mind they would pass by with little appreciation of their worth.  Journalling, blogging, conversing - they make me grateful.  Looking back, around and ahead I know that there's much that's happened I need to remember and much yet to be done that I must consider.  

Here's to today, a fresh page and a poised pen...

New Dawn: It's prayer Jim, but not as we know it...

From the 28th - 29th January (just a few weekends time) Theresa Stone, Emma Nicholson and I are going to eat, sleep and pray on a big beautiful boat with a whole bunch of other people :)  Why?  Well the CYE sailing centre have invited our little 24-7 Prayer team to come and lead a group of people through a weekend on prayer.  Theresa and I worked on our sessions this morning and got rather excited by all the dreams and schemes we have planned.

It's going to be a cornacopia of teaching, experience, space and creativity. I can't wait.

If you're in the UK and fancy join in I think there are still some spaces left.  If you want a chance to look at deepening your conversation with God by looking at who we are, how your personality affects your prayer life, trying prayer in ancient and modern ways and getting some inspiration and encouragement, then come and join us. More info here.

Look Mum I'm in a music video... sort of...

24-7 Prayer peep by day, covers band signer by night; it may be cheesy and but I love it. Since 2007 Steve and I have gotten together with Nathan, Steve C, Jimmy E and a few lovely extras to have some fun and be a part of making people's celebrations rock a little harder.  The DeLoreans, as our band is called, has been growing over the years and 2012 seems to be no exception.  The summer is looking rather full already (gulp!)

As we don't play many public gigs we decided it was high time we put a little promo video together.  The talented and lovely Tom Deane joined us for a (long) day at the Revs Venue before Christmas and the result is above.  What do you think?

I foolishly thought that making a music /promo video would be a glamorous affair.  How wrong could I be.  To make the above 3 minutes and 35 seconds of footage in this video we spent 10 hours playing the same songs and busting out the same moves over and over again. By the end I couldn't remember my name let alone the words to Crazy in Love!  Hehe - it was a blast though and I think the result was well worth the exertion! 

Youtube is made to haunt you with 16yr old versions of yourself...

via www.youtube.com

I had hoped that the featured video above was lost forever in dusty libraries along with cassette tapes and tydy shirts, but YouTube has once again proved that if anyone, anywhere caught you on camera it may one day come back to haunt you. This afternoon my Brother in law emailed me with one simple, fear inducing question... is that you?

Above is a video of Delirious performing on Littlehampton beach in 1997, (it's worth a watch for the fashion alone) but at 1.21 and 1.41, I groaned at seeing my younger self looking way to keen during the Happy Song. When this programme was aired on telly I was embarrassed enough but here it is in all it's glory to tease me 14 years later.

Why don't I have a fringe? Why was I do enthusiastic? Who said chokers were a good idea?! Oh well, at least watching this about once a week will keep me humble... If I ever get to big for my boots just a few bars of the Happy Song should put my right back in my place.

End of the world as we know it?

"As 2012 dawns many are speculating about what the next 12 months will bring. Some look ahead with hope, others with fear, as this year seems to be one of the most anticipated and discussed since the turn of the millennium. So what’s ahead of us: more financial turmoil, political change, spiritual transformation, the end of the world, or something else? Should we all stock up on tinned goods and start digging shelters, or could there be signs of hope and faith: God’s Kingdom on the move..."

This is the opening paragraph of a little article I've been musing on this week.  I wrote for the 24-7 Prayer tribes and if you're interested you can read on here.

Monster Mash

The inaugural gathering of the latest incarnation of Film Club could not have gotten off to a better start.  In my enthusiasm I tweeted that Ellie, Paul, Steve and I had gathered to watch 'Mobsters' (a rather dated looking gangster flick).  Thankfully we actually took in the splendour and subtly of 'Monsters', and what a masterpiece it was.  

We went into the film knowing as little as we could (well apart from me - I'd seen it before) and took in what is sure to be one of the most unique science fiction dramas in a very long time.  Monsters follows the emotional and physical journey of two unlikely companions as they make there way through dangerous, alien-infected territory.  Beyond that I will say nothing about the plot.  It's such an interesting idea that it's best to just take it as it comes.  Remove as many preconceived ideas about what a film with Aliens should be like, in fact approach it like a travel film and you'll probably be more ready for what it has to offer.  

As the film ended we immediately hit play to re-watch the beginning and piece the plot together.  Once we'd oo'd, aaa'd and decided what we wanted the end to be, we watched the 'making of...' and were blown away all over again.

Did you know that each new Star Wars film is rumoured to have cost $100 million?  Well, this ambitious little British film was produced for the unconfirmed amount of $15000!  What is George Lucas spending his money on?!  Solid gold portaloos?! Monsters is an exquisite film shot gorilla style with a small but very talented British crew and a cast that throws professional leads with non-actors.  The whole spend of the film (marketing, etc.) is reported to be less than half a million dollars, yet it is one of the most creative, magical and resourceful cinema offerings to come from our great nation.   Proof positive that money does not a good film make.  

Anyone else seen Monsters?  What did you think? 

Films to see before you die

From a young age I've been enthralled by the glamour, magic and adventure of the silver screen.  Weeks, maybe months of my life have been spent watching, analysing and day dreaming about films and the world they open up to us.  Provoking dramas, heart warming romances, side splitting comedies, nail biting thrillers, other worldly fantasies, mind bending SciFis, nightmare inducing Zombie flicks and edge of your seat action; I love them all.  I even have a penchant for a really bad / good movie.  You know the kind; they have horrendous scripts, preposterous plots but there's delight in their on screen disaster.

A passion for film is something I am very grateful that Steve enjoys too.  Before we were married we made the strategic purchase of a Cineworld Card so that we could pay an amount every month and be able to go on movie dates even if we ran out of money waiting for the next pay slip to arrive.  Our little plastic cinema IDs have been put to good use as we've taken in dozens of films a year.  We've been more open to taking risks as the only limit to the number we see is the time we have.  New Actors, Directors and Screenwriters have become must see contributors and though, I'll be honest, we've seen a lot of rubbish, our passion for film remains.

Tonight Steve and I embark on a new chapter in our film following... a little informal film club. We have many friends who share our passion and a few of us have decided to stop reminiscing about film club of yester-year and planning a future one and to just get on and do it.  The idea is we'll take one Monday night a month and watch one film together we can enjoy and maybe chat about.  The big question is... how do we go about picking them!

We don't want to go too heavy every time we gather but I'd love to broaden my film pallet and maybe see some of those must see titles.  Today I started googling "Films to see before you die" and some interesting links showed up.  Most of them referenced this offering of 50 must sees by film critics and the good people at Film4.  (The list is presented a little easier to scan through by the BBC here.)  There were other lists online but this was the one to grab my attention.

Of the 50 recommended I have seen only 18.  There were some that surprised me (Erin Brockovich?  Good but top 50!?) and others that made me smile (Terminator 2 - classic!)  It made me start to wonder if I were compiling a list from my limited viewing thus far what would I include?  Missing from this list and definitely included on mine are:  the original Star Wars Trilogy, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy (I'm assuming they were missed off because they weren't one film), Amelie, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless mind, The original Superman movie and recent films like Children of Men, Super 8 and Iron Man (it's an excellent example from the recent Marvel cannon).  There are others not on this list that I have yet to see and am surprised aren't included: Seven Samurai, Casablanca, Gone with the Wind etc. but this list has definitely got me started with film club suggestions.

What do you think?  

What are the films you feel you should have seen but haven't?  

Which films would you beg others to see before they die? Answers in comments please!

Post-it Notes of hope

Last night, I slept badly. I tossed and turned, mind half awake and waiting for my alarm to sound. It was deeply frustrating. I was wakeful because I was worried. There's a lot ahead of me this weekend, not bad things just stuff that needs juggling. Each challenge felt like another ball I must keep in the air and I was mentally limbering up for today's throwing and catching.

After a bracing pre-dawn walk, the door of the 24-7 Prayer Room closed behind a friend and I found myself alone with God.  After a poor night of rest I was up early and here was my opportunity to splurge my head noise in prayer. I kneeled down to pray the entering liturgy we've written for the week and started to hand God everything in my head. One line in particular jumped out at me:

"In this hour I will give myself to the work of prayer, this is about God's concerns not mine."

It pulled me up short, I could easily fill the hour with worries and pleas (and this wouldn't necessarily be wrong), but what if God had other ideas? I walked around the room looking for how the space had changed since my last visit - it's one of my favourite things about these sacred spaces. I love seeing the prayer room fill with prayers , dreams, ideas, art work and catch a glimpse of what God's up to in our community. Each day it's different, each day another 24(ish) people have taken an hour out of life to see what happens when they say 'hi' to Jesus.  

As I reach the Wailing Wall / Wailing Cargo Net I spotted a prayer I had written just yesterday. I'd scribbled it in tears and it represent the thing I've wrestled most with in the last year. On top of my little yellow plea was a green post-it note. On that green post it note someone had written a few simple words, an echoing prayer. It did my heart the world of good to see that someone else cared enough to spend part of their hour praying for me. That was it - all my plans were out the window. The next hour wouldn't be about my stress, my concerns; the next hour would be about the other prayers pinned to this slightly musty smelling net.

I worked my way along the wall reading the anonymous prayers of others and the little Green post-it notes of encouragement stuck to them. As I began to add my amen to those who'd gone before me I felt the stress I'd been carrying start to ebb away. I was moved by the single word pleas, the three different posts about struggling with cancer and the beautiful heartfelt prayers of love and hope.

To end my hour I posted a prayer on blue paper for assistance with my day. By the time I finally wrote my prayer I felt entirely different about it. I placed it among dozens of others and knew I was leaving my life in good hands. As the next person knocked on the door, my fatigue and the day ahead seemed demoted in my awareness and gratitude had taken it's place. Prayer Rooms are good for me :)

(Written Friday, posted Saturday)

Sticky people: why I would find it hard to leave

I never thought I could have friends like these. Last night I sat around a table eating burgers with five great friends celebrating the birthday one in particular. Beautiful Helen Monkton embarked on another year yesterday, and marked the occasion with meat, chips and massive ice cream sundays! An excellent choice. As we laughed, joked, questioned and regaled each other with stories of yester year, I realised that I have known each of them for over a decade.

A decade… wow… time flies.

It doesn't seem like twelve and a half years since I moved down from the midlands to this gorgeous city. I have albums full of photos of hanging out with these same friends, just ten years younger (and with *cough* interesting haircuts). As i shared my reflection we began to get nostalgic about the many adventures and dreams we've shared together. The girls present (Charlotte, Ellie, Helen and I) realised our friendships really got going during the first season of 24-7 Prayer and mission on the island of Ibiza. The prayer room, the 24-7 movement and community we used to call Warehouse has shaped us all, brought us together, deepened our bond. We've shared many laughs, tears, lessons learned and lots in between. I even ended up marrying one of them (er... not Helen, Ellie or Lottie but one of the blokey sundea eaters below.)

This is what makes Chichester a difficult place to leave. I don't have any plans to right now, but when I think about the possibility it isn't just a beauty of the city, the coast or downs that make me reluctant; it's the people. We share life, not as a sentimental statement, but in daily truth. These are the people I'm stuck too.  I hope we remain stuck together even if life takes us further apart.

The DeLoreans get a face lift

via www.thedeloreansband.com

The lovely Mr Elliot, famed for his furious fingers (er... he plays guitar) has been working his magic on the DeLoreans website. The facelift / spruce up / funkifying affect is quite pleasing. Bravo young man, bravo. My favourite aditions include the juke box of our repertoire, the TV that plays videos of us and the testimonials laid out like a Back to the Future style newspaper. Nice.

In other DeLoreans related news (said in my best Veronica Corningstone voice), I saw the first cut of our recently shot promo vid. After I got over my initial yuck-I-don't-like-seeing-myself-on-film reaction I quite liked it! I never thought our musical experiment to have fun and hang out together would still be going strong six years later. The secret's in the dedication to Sausage Club/Fest.  Hurrah for the DeLoreans and here's to more Weddings, parties, bah-mitzvahs etc. in 2012.  

Lazy days, winter walks & sleep deprivation

Christmas was bliss.  Two weeks of family, friends, good food, short walks, gifts given and received, lazy days with my man and the launch of particularly exciting sleep deprivation project (aka a 24-7 Prayer Room).  It couldn't have been better.  This morning as I cleared my inbox I found this photo sent from my sister in law Sarah of myself, Steve's Nana and my other lovely sister in law Emma on a Christmas day walk.  I am so blessed to have such a lovely family to compliment the Trundle tribe.

Today I launch back into my regular rhythm of 6.30am alarms and chilly commutes.  Despite pulling the 2-3am prayer room shift I actually feel refreshed and ready for work.  In the coming week I'll post about my thoughts on 2011 (events, travels, books, words that have stayed with me) but today I'm feeling the 'new' in New Year.  The Revs prayer space has been the perfect way to begin; a reawakening of my heart and mind as I step back into the rush of emails, meetings and dreaming for 2012.

An Unassuming Sacred Space

There are sacred spaces in this world, some are marked with signs and heralds, others with great art and paths well trod by pilgrims, but there are many that can be passed by unnoticed; unnassuming places that have nothing visible to point to the encounters that have happened there.  The conference room in the Revelation Church Warehouse is one such sacred space.  

Teenagers gather in it, businesses and groups meet there, performers have used it as a green room and club nights as an entrance.  I wonder if anyone of them knew that the carpet tiles they were standing on are holy ground?  

It was in this rather boring looking room that I learned how to pray.  There were words, thoughts, movements, paintings, tears, music and many other expressions involved in my search for a language...  but this was the space in which my 18 year old heart learned to connect to God's.  In a smelly, beautiful, messy and glorious place later named a 24-7 Prayer Room. My life's direction has been set by my solitary lessons in God's love and conversation over a few short months in 1999.  Now I pour myself into helping others do the same.  

Today as I stood in that conference room, surrounded by my Revs family, tears slid down my cheeks and my heart was moved.  We gathered to welcome 2012, a new day a New Year with the launch of our first 24-7 Prayer Room in a few years.  As I worshipped I realised that if I'd had some stones to hand, I'd have been piling them there.  This room is my Gilgal.  The place God brought me, a watershed between one part of my life and the next.  Today I remembered the time I had spent there, the prayers God had responded to and the way we were changed.  As I remembered I longed.  Revelation is striding into a new adventure; we're looking forward.  We don't want the glory days gone by, we want the presence of God and His mission for us now.  This sacred space is a key.  

I have numerous hours alone and with Cymbrogi set aside in this room in the week ahead.  Lord I'm coming to meet with you.  Could this be a new watershed for me, for all of us?  Speak Lord, your servants are listening...

Don't know what 24-7 Prayer is?  Check out the website and this nifty little vid below...

Snapshots from Kuala Lumpur

 

Christmas is a coming...

I cannot wait!  I love the twinkly lights in the shop windows, the slight panic when I think about gift shopping, the food, the drink, the parties and the prayer... oh yes... the prayer. Here are just three ways I'm finding that Christmas feeling in the coming month.

This Friday the Harding household plays host to our annual Proxy Christmas celebration.  The month early celebration of Jesus birth where we share Christmas dinner with over a dozen of our friends.  For over five years this rather barmy (and very early) Christmas party has launched our holiday season with our Chichester family helping us decorate the house, put up our tree and have our own near-thanksgiving celebration.  

The following Monday before I jet off to Malaysia (can't wait!) I'll be joining thousands of others in praying through the advent season with the 24-7 Spaces podcast.  I loved our wee podcast that took us through lent earlier this year and as I prayed with my mates I felt connected to them despite the distance.  Find out more about the podcast in the preview vid below and pray along with subscription info here.

Grab a stone, pray for Turkey...

Turkey is reeling and rescue attempts continue after the worst earthquake in decades hit the nation on Sunday afternoon. The BBC are reporting that 239 people have died and over a thousand have been injured. Sadly the death toll is expected to rise. Looking at the photos and videos of rescue and rubble online, it's hard not to be moved by such devastation.

How can we respond and pray for the people of Turkey at such a tragic time of crisis? Honestly, today I found it difficult to know where to begin. I spent a some time reading reports online and asking God how we should pray…

Here is the simple way the 24-7 team have come up with - why don't you join us?

Go and find a stone and keep it with you all day. When you see it think about the situation in Turkey and prayer for:

1. Strength and protection for the thousands of rescue workers and medics working to free and treat people still trapped in the rubble. 
2. Comfort and our loving God to be with the families of those found dead or still awaiting news of loved ones. 
3. The tens of thousands of people who slept outdoors in freezing temperatures last night. For the shelter and for the government to respond quickly and efficiently to protect and house those now homeless. 
4. For God to protect the nation of Turkey from common after effects of earthquakes like water contamination and desease.

Coming up for air

Where have I been this last week?  Well let me tell you.

I've been lunching with lovely Australians caught up in this movement of prayer.
Planning the advent season of 24-7 Spaces podcast 
Dreaming and scheming over a cup of tea with my lovely mate Pete Greig
Breakfasting with a good friend and catching up on her love life
Experimenting with my wardrobe
Writing articles, resources, emails, briefs and much more
Learning to use a Canon 5D camera
Turning my living room into a salon for several hair cuts and colours
Finishing the Old Testament (at last!) and embarking on the excitement of the new
Sighing in relief at the last episode in this season of Dr Who and trying to find time to watch Downton Abbey and Merlin!
Coming up with an amazing and super cheesy new medley with the DeLoreans - themes from 80s dance films - oh yeah it's special
Planning not 1, not 2, but three talks for this week!
Driving to the midlands and back singing Christmas Carols with my gorgeous hubby
Responding to around a thousand emails (if I'm exagerating it's not by much!)
Saying sorry for being a muppet
Hugging friends old and new and giving out shoulder rubs
Thinking about mentoring others and what that means!?
Spending the day with the amazing UK team from World Vision
Editing a job description for an exciting new role in 24-7 Prayer!
Meeting with the 24-7 International Leadership Team
Trying to sleep

It's a little busy at the moment and it doesn't stop here.  Tomorrow I head to Frankfurt for the 24-7 Prayer Eurogathering - eek I can't wait!  Who's coming?  Anyone up for a tequilla/whiskey/wine/what ever beverage of your choice and a chin wag?

No pain, no gain

It seems my blog posts are either bubbling over with excitement, a glimpse into my messy head or thoroughly shallow splurges at the moment.  I'm embracing it!  This morning I have clothing on my mind.  Yesterday I had one of those thoroughly girly moments that if I didn't have scrupples would have sent me flying credit card in hand to my local high street - I am sooo bored of my wardrobe!

Oh yeah - I just typed that cliche!

I am bored of my TShirts, my lack of trend, my not quite fitting right trousers... I have lamented the departure (into the bin) of beloved tops and tights that have fallen foul of washing machine holes.  I want to shop.  Here's the thing though... it's like there are two voices in my head.  The tempestuous two year old who likes shiny, new things and the rather more creative 30 something who wants to live like I believe beauty comes from within, it's best not to consume for the sake of it and that it's good to use things until they truly wear out.  

Thankfully I had a brain wave.  

I decided to make one small purchase and then play dress up with clothes I already own.  I bought tights - I opened my wardrobe and I put things together I'd never thought of before.   Fun!  I decided I have more than I think I do and all it takes is a little reshuffle, a smidgen of creativity and perhaps the willingness to wear more heals to spice up my daily wardrobe.  I began today by breaking out shorts and my new tights with a newish pair of heals.  As I walked to the Guildford office from the train station I remembered why they were still newish - I keep chickening out of breaking them in properly.  Ouch!  Oh well, has to happen sometime - no pain, no gain.  Everytime I longed for my slobby, comfy stuff I looked down and thought, "Oooo pretty."  

Wow - I really am shallow :)

What's all the fuss about?

 

Friday night was the culmination of weeks, nay months, of prayer and preparation.  The Push Community, our recent labour of love, said a big hello to the world as the website went live and we worshipped with friends.  I spent a lot of my free time last week collaborating with Steve in editing the above video for the launch.  Check it out.  (No serious - stop reading and press play; my limited video editing ability meant hours of work!)

The first song from this worship and song-writing collective is available to stream for free on the site and will be available to download from iTunes this week.  It's called "God you are good" and I've had it pretty much on repeat all weekend.  Sophia who wrote it has been leading me in worship through my iPhone headphones.  It's gorgeous and only beaten in my estimation by her most recently finished song 'Jesus you're more'. It gives me goosebumps everytime I hear it.  I think it'll be released some time in the near future.  

I'm always proud of my lovely husband, but Friday I was particularly glowing.  The Push Community is about everything Steve was made for - worship, developing/investing in/loving people and pushing creativity in music.  He's already given so much in time, skill and energy into this community, it's amazing to start to see the fruit.  

Let's push things forward...

Two days and counting until the Push Community says a big hello to the world. The worship and song writing collective that Steve is at the hub of, has been preparing for this week for months.  My free time has been spent editting videos, writing blog posts and generally helping out as Steve works on website content and rehearses for Friday night's gig.  It's all looking pretty good and the first track they're releasing at the weekend sounds great.  I have little energy for any other writing so this blog may be a bit quiet for a few days.  I'll be back soon though.  

I may be a Creep, but at least I'm an animated Creep...

 

Wow - animated people jumping out of windows!  I love this music video.  (Er... that reads weird)  I came across the above during a creative sesson Scot and had to create the brief for the new 24-7 Prayer animation.  As we brainstormed drawing styles he dashed out of the room to grab a laptop and show me the above.  It's brilliant! 

If you like radiohead this video is a must play.  It's a little downbeat/morose for the mood of our little film but the drawing is stunning.  Anyone got any animators or videos that might help us in writing our brief?  We're making an animation called "Why Pray?"  We want it to feel young, fun, a little playful, international but able to pack a bit of a punch.  Our storyboard/naration is based on some brilliant ideas from Pete Greig and is shaping up nicely. Scot and I are meeting with an animator next Monday :)  

Steve Harding, Steve Harding - can people be homonyms?

Less than a month after reading a novel about a chance meeting of two guys with the same name, life is mimicing fiction in my inbox.  Today I got an email from my lovely brother in law Nick (above left) about a certain someone's upcoming birthday.  He sent it to his wife, to Steve (above right) and I, and as I finished reading it I noticed that my hubby had been very quick off the mark in responding.  This was his email...

"Hello Nick:

While I personally believe that everyone should have... [er I'm deleting this bit for present confidentiality reasons.]  I don't think I'm the Steve Harding you really wanted to reach.

I'm an American journalist, and I live in Washington D.C. That being said, does your branch of the Harding family have any ties to Loughborough in Leicestershire? My people left there in 1832 for the dubious charms of North America.

Cheers,
Steve Harding"

Amazing!  Who knew another Steve was just an email address typo away!  OK maybe that's not so unbelievable but it's very cool he took the time to email back.  As someone facinated by string theory and multiverse fiction I can't help wondering whether the two Steve's are anything alike.  I know they're not the same Steve from different dimensions but what if they'e American and British counterparts!  Facinating!  

Have you ever met someone with exactly the same name?  Were they anything like you?  Oooo now I want to have a Carla and Steve Hardings dinner party and invite our names sakes from all over the world.  All in the name of science of course... xc

AMAZING: New Muppets trailer parodies Girl With The Dragon Tattoo

via www.totalfilm.com

This is genius. Only the muppets could make this happen. I will see the film solely on this trailer that probably has nothing to do with the plot!

Book thirty: Bonhoeffer was a smart bloke

This lunchtime, as I sat under a weak sun munching on peanut butter and jam sandwiches, I finished the final passages of Dietrich Bonhoeffer's book, 'Life Together'. My conclusions are thus:

a. He's a pretty smart bloke
b. It's a beautifully Christo-centric look at life, community and growth
c. This sphere of thinking has greatly inflenced my sub-family within the Christian Church

Reading Bonheoffer's words brought into sharp focus the reasoning behind many values and aspirations I'm very familiar with.  (Not that we have perfectly attained them!)  It's a book I have imediately decided I want to share and re-read.  I love how he considers community life, and keeps it firmly focussed on living for Jesus and serving each other.  His words, though first published around 60 years ago, are incredibly relevant and challenging to the individualistic and self-gratifying culture we live in. 

I highly recommend reading this short but meaty text; it's written with a wonderful heart even if the translation and contextualisation of some of his ideas made me smile. I've ordered a copy of his other famous work 'The Cost of Discipleship' so it's likely he'll be making another appearance in my great reading challenge of 2011.  (Speaking of which, I'm slowly catching up with my target - hurrah!)

A matter of life and death

I find it an humbling and slightly frightening privilege/challenge to talk to people about God.  I've been speaking as part of the team at Revelation Church for some years now, but the opportunity and responsibility is never lost in me.  Particularly when I'm looking at such a profound and life altering passage like John chapter 11.  

Last Sunday I shared a few thoughts on the account of Jesus raising Lazarus from the dead and it felt like a week of thought, prayer, tears and conversation were reaching a head.  This was a challenging one...  I had to do some business of my own with God before even thinking about what from my study and prayer I'd share with the Revs family.  I think it was true to say I was a little apprehensivetalking about life, death, grief, pain, hope, heaven, paradox and what it means to follow Jesus here and now.  In case you missed it I blogged a little about it last week.

"I am, right here and now, the resurrection and the life...
Do you believe this?" Jesus

Obviously Jesus is pretty spectacular in this passage, but I've become a bit of fan of Thomas, and I don't mean the Tank Engine.  It was the small, blink-and-you'd-miss-it role this disciple played and his ongoing journey of doubt, joy and determination that challenged me most as I studied last week.  As I shared about his journey and the perspectives of Jesus, Martha and Lazarus, I was moved by the number of people who shared my reaction.

If you're interested in listening to where I got to in my reflections you can download a recording or listen online here.  A special thanks to those who prayed as I prepared.

Has prayer been feminized? My thoughts.

This morning I switched on my tweetdeck to read this post from the lovely Brian Heasley:

"Anyone else ever worry that prayer has become overly feminized http://brianheasley.blogspot.com/2011/09/feminized-prayer.html I posted some thoughts @247prayer"

Brian is a brilliant blogger, I've been reading his Curious in Ibiza musings for many a year and I love how he can take a topic and stir up a bit of debate.  The one he's hit on today is an interesting one and mirrors my thoughts from this past weekend particularly.

Fundamentally I agree with Brian's concern.  Within European circles there do seem to be a lot more chicks than blokes involved in leading and taking part in prayer.  (I don't think this is true in other continents but let's limit this to a close to home discussion.) I do lead the prayer team he mentions and he's right over the years we've had two (amazing) guys and seven women involved.  This is actually been something of a concern for us and though we've actually sought to include more men we've found that difficult.  It's not that there aren't many men with deep prayer lives, more often that their primary energy in serving and leading is channeled elsewhere.  For example the corresponding 24-7 Communities team is all male.  

Are women drawn to prayer and men drawn to community leadership?  Is the trend a gender or cultural bias?

I think there is an element of what you see is what you replicate. Though many streams of the church have embraced female leadership in the last century there seem to be more men that women leading in this context.  Could women be more involved in prayer because we've lacked male champions to point the way for their peers?

Now I am speaking in very broad generalisations because I actually know a lot of very prayerful men.  Ian Cole, Etienne Piek, Pete Grieg (the leader of 24-7 Prayer!) and Brian himself (to name four of many) have led the way in this area.  I think men can and do have deep personal prayer lives and many in my community meet regularly to pray with one or two other guys. But, as I said, in general and in my own community experience, corporate prayer does seem more regularly and eagerly engaged with by women than men.

Why?

Sorry Brian I don't think it has to do with women traditionally staying at home or men going to work and the time that potentially gives you. (All the home Mums I know are very busy women!) 

I think style has something to do with it.  As our church circles have moved more in creative and contemplative prayer we may arguably not have considered both genders in our approach.  I've generally found that extreme and active prayer times attract a more balanced cross-section of the genders, where as our regular prayer breakfast has a ratio of about 2-1, women to men. 

What do you guys think?  I take this issue very seriously as it's something I really want to see change.  Do you think there is an imbalance in the genders in prayer?  Do you have any inklings as to why? What could we do to make it more open for all? (Read Brian's original blog post here.)

Ten years since the towers fell

What can you write on a day like today?  What can you say about that day ten years ago when millions of people held their breath and watched in shock at an attack and a catastrophy unfold, live, before our eyes. Has the world changed since the 9th September 2001?  

My good friend Scot is writing a piece for 24-7 Prayer on what's happened since 9/11 and how the world has been impacted.  To help him collate his thoughts he sent me a many others three questions.  I wanted to mark this day somehow, but I wasn't sure how... so, here they are; my answers.  If you're able why not tell me yours in the comments...

1. The world is reminded almost daily that everything changed 10 years ago with the terrorist attack on America. What were you doing when you first saw the news broadcasts what was your response and what changed for you that day? 

I was in the 24-7 Prayer office in Chichester. We were just a small team then, unaware of how far this movement would spread. I was volunteering in my free time whilst studying at Chichester University. A friend walked into the office and told us the news. We were so shocked, it didn't feel real. I headed home and many of our friends gathered in our living room to watch the news.

2. What if anything has changed over the last 10 years with regard to Prayer movements and initiatives? have you seen or sensed an increase in prayer in the church nationally, in your region and around the world?

I don't know if it's connected but there has been such an acceleration in prayer across the globe in the last ten years. At the celebration for the Global Day of Prayer last year I was amazed by the number of movements that have sprung up throughout the last decade. God has called us to pray. It may look, sound and feel a little different from place to place, generation to generation, but there seems to be no doubt the heart is the same. We need him. The world needs him. We must pray.

3. Jesus said 'blessed are the peacemakers' looking forward to the months and years ahead what can we do to become bringers of peace to a world in conflict?

I think the key to peace is love, so the question I'm challenged to ask is "What does love look like?" Love is more than a word, an idea, a command, it's the pivot around which Jesus asks us to centre our lives. When faced with tragedy, with someone who's hurt us, with a need, or a thanks, or an opportunity, we can ask... What does loving prayer look like here? What does loving action look like now?

Book twenty nine: authority and submission

I fancied a little bible study this week so the twenty nineth book in my 52 in a year project was 'The Role and Ministry of Women' by Martin Scot.  I whipped through this short bible study in a couple of hours and found it an interesting read.  I particularly liked his thoughts on the nature of authority and submission.  Can anyone recommend any other good books or study on the topic?

Book twenty eight: Best fantasy I've read this year!

The Final Empire by Brandon Sanderson is one of the best books I have read this year!  A generous gift from a fellow fantasy enthusiast I whipped through this tale of intrigue, politics and allomancy at lightening speed.  Finally, a book to rush home for, a book to stay up way past my bed time and awake tired next the day for.  I absolutely loved the complexity of the characters, the suspense and the fullness of the world it's set in.  There was a great sense of reality and physicality, and I was genuinely surprised by the twists and turns of the plot.  Can't wait to read the next in the series.  

I will say no more because it was a truly original read and I'm going to be passing it around my fellow fantasy geeks to share the love.  If you like a thrilling tale of fantastical lands this is a must read.

Lunching with the lovely Togwells

There are few things more glorious than eating sherbert out of a vintage tea cup in a quirky cafe with great friends.  Yesterday afternoon the 24-7 team decamped to Drink, Shop, Do near Kings Cross to do just that (though technically I'm the only one who turned her tongue pink eating sherbert).

Our lunchtime celebrations were in honour of an amazing couple: Phil and Emma Togwell.  For the last five years Phil has led the 24-7 Prayer UK team.  He's done a splendid job sharing his time, wisdom and home with many.  However, this September heralds a change as Phil leaves behind his UK role to focus on a rather exciting new venture: Prayer Spaces in Schools.   

Yesterday we lunched, gave gifts and honoured Phil and Emma for all they've invested up this point. Even though we weren't saying goodbye, it seemed important to recognise the journey and sacrifice of the last decade.  Prayer Spaces in UK Schools are taking off and they couldn't be in safer hands.  I am particularly chuffed as this move in role means I get to work even more closely with Mr Togwell and look forward to benefitting from a lot of laughter, musing and book recommendations in the years to come... xc

It takes courage to have hope

Prepare yourself for a random stream of thought... Courage, hope, life and compassion are the themes rummaging around in my head this week.  On Sunday I'm speaking to my community, Revelation Church, on Jesus' words,

"I am the resurrection and the life." John 11:25.  

It's an incredible passage.  Jesus arrives to find that someone he loves (Lazarus) has died and in verse 35, the shortest verse in the Bible, it says that "Jesus wept."  Jesus... wept... Jesus who went on to raise Lazarus to life... who knew the future hope... who had the power... stopped and wept in present pain.

Pain and Joy. Loss and hope. Death and Life. 

We each live with these opposites everyday.  You don't have to look far to see the promise of life in a new born baby or a relationship reconciled.  You don't also have to look very far to see brokeness, injustice, depression, disconnection...  The kingdom of God is here; and it's fullness is yet to come...

People living with the eternal perspective of resurrection life have to be able to be comfortable with paradox.  How do we keep sight of Jesus, of the hope and life he offers?  How do we remain courageous hope-rs even in the face of apparent failure or death?  

I WANT COURAGEOUS HOPE!  

A hope that is rooted in something deep and stable, in someone loving and good.  A hope that will carry me through life and all it has to throw at me.  Everytime I'm knocked down I want to get back up and dare to believe that things will be better, that God is moving.  I want to pray with that hope, love with that hope, live like that hope and life and love is all that matters.  I want a heart like Jesus' that can be fully present in pain but with the courage to bring life through God... 

I think that I can't talk about resurection hope without talking about brokeness and pain.  Feels a bit heavy and I'm nervous.  Lots of praying and thinking and reading to do between now and Sunday but I guess I'll get there.  If my current thoughts are headed in the right direction then God will give me a way to express them...

Hmm this all reads very negative but it's actually really positive in my head.  What use is hope if it's not needed.  There is a lot of need.  How do we live as people praying, breathing, living, bringing ressurection life here and now?  Don't hold me to this stream of thought - I reserve the right to end up going in another direction with this passage on Sunday, but here and now, its provoking some interesting conversation... x

Meeting Mr Milo

Good news everyone (don't worry this isn't a Dr Farnsworth moment), my gorgeous little french born nephew has been repatriated into the UK!  Huzzah!  Yesterday Steve and I sped to West Hoathly to see Nick, Sarah and the lovely (and very little) Milo George Harding.  Our little soldier is doing very well though it's going to be a few months before all the new born clothes we bought for him will fit properly.  Despite being 9/10 weeks premature he's doing superbly - quite the little miracle.  

Sarah is a marvel - despite a rather frightening birth she is happy, relaxed and a very natural mother.  Milo is one lucky boy.  He is incredibly loved.  Looking at him I was amazed by how much he looked like a miniature version of his Father.  A great way to end the weekend and start the week. Thank you God for looking after Milo and bringing him to us safely (if a little early!)

A Passion for Pioneering - birthing the Push Community

 

I'm incredibly proud of my handsome husband at the moment.  At the end of this month the worship/songwriting collective he's been part of pulling together, will say a big hello to the world.  For years now Steve has longed to try something a little different in the sphere of music development.  In 2010 he found two friends who felt the same way and together they began Push. 

The Push Community is not terribly easy to describe because it doesn't fit neatly into previous industry categories.  At it's heart it's a community of Jesus followers who are particularly passionate about worship and creativity in song writing.  They're from different churches, different towns across the UK but they come together to create together and share what's working with the world.

Steve, Tom and Doug are committed to seeing each one be able to stay in their local community whilst being developed spiritually and musically.  They've already begun recording the songs that could be used nationwide and aim to help each song writer get their song out there without having to sign a record contract that locks them in beyond that song (often it can be for a number of albums or years.)

This very open approach to development and publishing could backfire I guess, but I love that there's only community and the value of growing together, rather than a piece of paper, that's going to keep everyone in this.

The first larger gathering of song writers was Sunday night. As they worship, prayed and shared the songs they were working on I was moved by the depth and passion in the room.  There will be some amazing sounds to fill our churches coming out in the next few months.

I've been supporting Steve and helping out where ever I can with writing (er blogs not songs... my songs would suck), editing a cool little video, and generally taking notes, offering social media advice, praying and making tea.  There's a real energy to this stage in their development.  Reminds of what it's like every time the 24-7 community takes a plunge off the deep end following God somewhere new.  There's something in me that lives for these times.

The boys are working on a website as a hub for those interested in connecting with the community and I'll let you know when their cyber home and their Twitter account, Facebook page and YouTube channel is up and running.  If you're in the south of England they're launching with a live event in Bognor Regis, in the church of the first worship leader they're publishing.  The lovely Sophia Jenkins is just 17 years old and has a beautiful heart and voice.  I'll be there, let me know if you will be too :)

When I grow up I want to be like Alana

One of the greatest blessings I have experienced being a part of the 24-7 family are the people I've met.  I have laughed, learned and walked through a lot with some incredible people from all over the world.  One such person, has just flown away from the UK, crossing that great atlantic pond to move back to the US...

I miss her already.

Alana - come back!

The title of this post is a bit of a jokey compliment... technically I am a grown up (apparently) and Alana and I are peers, but I guess I can't help but look up to this amazing woman.  She has challenged me to think, taught me a lot, recommended many amazing books, been very kind, and given me something to aspire to in my life long persuit in getting to know God.  I know I'm not alone.  For the last few years, Alana's been doing this as a friend and mentor to many young men and women.  The UK is a poorer place without her in it.  

Alana I pray good things as you re-settle in your near-Boston home.  I know our friendship will not end here (skype call with mango smoothies soon!)  Our paths will cross in one nation or another but in the mean time I've lost my coffee break philosopher... and I'm sad... I guess I'll have to settle with new conversations and adventures via blogs, twitter and the like, but Alana, please hurry up and write your books!  I'm still expecting you to challenge me no matter what country you're living in xxx

Why do I watch Top Model?

 

If there is one programme Steve can't stand it's the Top Model franchise.  I suspect he doesn't like being in the room when it's on.  I'm pretty sure he's thinking, 'how can my reasonably intellegent wife watch this?'  I don't like to get into too much, because he lets me watch it and part of me knows he's right...

Why do I watch Top Model?

There's a part of me that knows - I LOVE the photography.  I'm constantly amazed at rediculous looking shoots can produce the most interesting and beautiful stills.  However, I'm not sure sitting through the other 45 minutes of the show is worth it.  What does it say about beauty?  On one hand it's 'be individual' - on the other the modelling industry is entirely about scrutinising appearance (hats off to anyone with a thick enough skin and strong enough self image to endure it).  Also Top Model suffers from the same blight that most reality TV shows do...

Forced conflict...

Sigh.  I was once part of a documentary.  The people who made it were lovely, good people, but even with such a positive experience I was surprised how much action and dialogue was manipulated to tell the story they're were interested in, rather than necessarily what happened.  It was an eye opener into the world of 'reality' TV and documentaries.  I guess wouldn't be surprised to discover they're all scripted and cast like dramas.  

I gave up on Big Brother years ago because I became bored with the shock tactics and editing. I've abandoned almost all reality programming but there are two I still love... America's/Britains Next Top Model and The X Factor/American Idol.  (Ok technically they're four shows but I consider them two.)

I don't want to lose all sense of fun and shallow in my life but as I sipped my soup and caught an ANTM episode this lunchtime I couldn't help wondering... is it really worth watching?  What actually happens?  If you paired it down to the part I'm interested it in would be about 15 minutes long!

So time to confess - are you a reality TV adict?  What do you watch and why?  No judgement, I'm genuinely curious.  If there is very little reality what is the draw?  Are they the 21st Century equivalent of a soap opera or is it something more insiduous? 

Prepare yourself for a very shallow blog post...

This year I honestly thought my curly hair was a thing of the past... but good hair times have come again :)  

Oh yes.  I'm blogging about hair.  

I'll never forget the fateful swimming trip at university when to my horror I realised I couldn't dry my unruly sort of wavy hair and had to scrunch and hope for the best.  What emerged were curls.  CURLS!  Who knew.  I was 18 or 19 before I discovered my hair was curly.  From that moment on I never looked back.  

Most of the time I have what is known as an S curl.  My hair is so hyper wavy that as it grows longer is forms S curls and large loose cork screws (oh yes there are catagories of curls - google it).  For a few short, sun damaged years I had full on corkscrews (left) and had to go looking for a hair dresser who knew how to cut curly hair - it's not as straight forward as you think.  My curls are generally loose and can revert to my teenage triangle head, nightmare if cut bluntly, but never fear, Tracy was here and for the last decade my hair has been in her hands.   

2011 however, the year I turned 30, I thought my curls were going bye bye. Before Christmas I cut my hair super short and started using curling irons (I call them my magic curling wand).  Maybe it was the length, maybe it was the heat damage but the natural curl started to fall out of my hair.  I think I was more sad about that than leaving my 20s.  

A few weeks ago however I decided I was growing my hair longer after a fake hair/dress up day and Tracy came round to trim and shape it ready to let it grow.  From that moment on it's like her skill and my hair follicles have rewarded me!  I'm curly again!  

I know it's shallow to have written over 300 words about this but if gratitude in the small is the secret to contentment then I am a happy girl. (Er woman.  I'm 30 I guess I'm not a girl anymore.)

If you're a curly one I know you'll understand this splurge, if you're not consider it a glimpse into another world.   If anyone needs a good hair dresser Tracy is amazing - oh and I have discount vouchers for anyone who wants to give her a try.  Superficial moment over.  Must get down to serious stuff now :)

Great Scot it's Saturday!

Another Saturday, another DeLoreans gig. The crazy summer season starts to wind up through September, Steve and I will begin to reclaim a few Saturdays a month; but, that's not today, today is a performance day!  This morning has been full of song words, set lists, and costumes.  We've just finished wolfing down lunch watching Back to the Future 3 (the perfect DeLorean warm up!) and soon we'll be packing lugging gear and packing our van.  I'm not sure whether tonight I'm going to wear my hawaiian halterneck (above) or a sparkly little mini dress.  Guess I'll see how high the stage is.  

I have to say that being the lead singer of The Deloreans (Chichester's premiere covers band according to The Observer - check us out) is a pleasure.  The boys are lovely, singing is a blast and I get paid to have fun at parties... got to be one of the best jobs ever.  Definitely in my top two.  Better stop typing and start warming up.  Whatever you're up to this fine Saturday I hope you're having fun :)

I believe that children aren't our future...

I've had children on my mind today for two reasons...

(Noooo... neither reason is that I'm pregnant.  Just thought I'd get that in there before I start squeals and victory dances across the UK...)

The first reason for my thought theme is that Steve and I have a gorgeous and miraculous new nephew called Milo George Harding (pictured above)!  Rushing into the world a little early (32 weeks while Mummy and Daddy were in France on Holiday!) Milo made his debut at around 3lb and is putting on weight and strength an impressive speed.  The nurses at the French hospital that Milo is currently chilling at call him their little champion as they can't believe how well he's doing.  Dad (Nick), Mum (Sarah) and Milo hope to be back in the UK in early September and I can't wait to meet him.  He looks so cuddly.   Must get him a present; hmmm... a toy frog? A stripy top? Do they make baby berets? (Ok I'm going to stop as I'm wading into the realms of light racism :)

The second reason for dwelling on children is the title of this blog.  I've had that classic song,

"I believe the children are our future..."

on mental repeat and I've decided I totally disagree with it.  Children aren't our future. They're our present.  Present is all we have.  I was thinking on this and the rising worldwide phenomena of children in prayer.  My musings led to this little post on the 24-7 Prayer Blog.  I mean every word...

"The most powerful intercessor I think I've ever seen pray, was 13 years old."  

Food for thought.

Book twenty seven: friendship, love and truth

It's official; John Green has become one of my favourite authors.

“Will Grayson, Will Grayson” (written in collaboration with David Levithan) is the third book of his I’ve read, and like the previous two I absolutely loved it. Green has the ability to write characters that jump off the page and feel truly authentic in all their flawed glory. 

His latest literary offering has an interesting premise. Will Grayson, Will Grayson explores how a chance meeting drastically alters the life path of two people with the same name. Their journey explores love, relationship, friendship, depression, sexuality, truth and how we form and evolve our self-image. It may not be everyone’s cup of tea as there is strong language and sexual references, but it made me laugh out loud and cry in public.

Seriously.
I’m not joking. 
Weeping.
On a busy train.

The characters and relationships at the centre of this story felt so real I was celebrating and mourning with them page after page. I recommend this book if you’re interesting in a coming of age tale of teens exploring their identity and coming to terms with their sexuality in the modern world.  I have now pre-ordered my signed copy of his next book "The Fault in our Stars" and can't wait to hear it thud through our letter box.

Book twenty six: The Art of Prayer - Believe the Hype

There is only so many times you can hear a book praised to the high heavens before you feel you ought to give it a read. That’s pretty much what brought me to Timothy Jones’s book, “The Art of Prayer”.  Friends with great taste have raved about his contribution to the sea of literature on talking to God, and I have to say, they weren’t wrong.

It definitely floats to the top.
It’s brilliant.

Though my reading of “The Art of Prayer” has undoubtedly suffered from being put down and picked up over a busy few months, the value in these pages has not been lost on me. In grounded and demystifying language, Jones explores the highs, lows, beauty and challenge of prayer without once making it sound boring. This is quite a feat! I have been reminded of things I’ve forgotten, taught things I never knew, and brought through a rich tradition of prayer from a very personal perspective.

If you find prayer difficult or just fancy a refresher I highly recommend this read. It’s a good foundation and a very easy book to engage with. It definitely improved the quality of my conversation with God.

Book twenty three - twenty five: total froth

In a failed effort to keep reading during my book-a-week-in-2011 funk, I filled July with books that wouldn't tax a 12 year old.  They were uneventful and less than thrilling, merely filler in a year of challenge and adventure. Therefore I decided that rather than boring you (and myself) by posting about them individually, I would kill three birds with one post as I catch up on my pet project. Here goes... 

Book twenty three: The Undomestic Goddess

Utter drivel.  Exactly what I was looking for though it would have been nice if it was a little less predictable.  Also - does anyone really not know how to make toast?!

Book tweny four: Ultravoilet

Actually this little novel surprised me.  A rather unique and interesting concept for a science fiction / teen drama around perception, mental illness and obviously the love of a good alien!  I quiet enjoyed this one.  Maybe I'm being harsh lumping it into the drivel category...

Book twenty five: The Red Pyramid

I picked up this Rick Roirdan novel hoping it was as good as his Percy Jackson series.  Sadly, though it wasn't without it's charms, the Egyptian mythology reboot did not match the world of Greek gods engaging in western culture.  Splitting the perspective of the book between a brother and sister lead was a little jarring and this story felt younger than his others.  I may or may not continue the series.  We'll see how hard it is to find something more appealing.

To get back on track to achieve my goal I need to pick up six books in the next month or so.  Any suggestions of short and engaging reads to help my total? 

Being present: an evolving liturgy

This August my buzz word is 'presence'.  It's been on my mind.  I forget about it for a few days, maybe even a week, then something I read, pray or hear sparks the thread of 'present' thought back to life... Usually when such words and ideas persist like this it's a good idea for me to pay attention; I'm may be about to learn something.

It's amazing how a word evolves in our understanding and association.  For years of my life, to be present was to be in attendance at school,

"Carla Trundle"
"Present Miss"

It's also true that those seven little letters have represented gifts given and received.  In the last decade however the word presence has become inextricably linked in my mind with God and prayer.  It's not a new idea, (in fact it's as ancient as Eden) but I know it's key to greater quality in my relationship with Jesus...

We all have our little mantras, personal and informal liturgies that pepper our prayer lives.  A recent but persistent addition to my prayer vocabulary has been,

"Lord, make your presence felt."  

I've prayed it over my own life as well as over people, places and situations.  I quite deliberately used this line to replace my prayer of "Come, Lord," for no other reason than it struck me that He's already here; He's already everywhere. It's not His presence we're lacking, but an awareness of it.  

This idea grew.  I thought about it... then prayed it... then thought about it some more. Now I'm realising that my prayer mantra may be evolving again... I still want God to make His presence known, but I'm wondering if in most circumstances I'm approaching presence from the wrong direction.  A few weeks ago I found myself scribbling this prayer in my journal...

"Help me to live present to you."

I stared at those words... then I went over and over them in pen until they jumped out amid a page of scribbled prayers.  It felt like a break through, an epiphany.  Something I've always known but needed to recognise.  I thought back to the times in my 20s when God has felt distant and for most of them I realised that it wasn't His presence but mine that was the challenge...

Today I'm thinking about distraction, and wakefulness, and awareness.  How do I remain in attendance to God?  How do I give myself as a gift to the gift maker?

I guess it's what Brother Lawrence was getting at all those years ago, but I had to rearrange His sentence, His sentiment, the title of His writings to really get what he did.  Anyone got any ideas or tried any similar prayer experiments?  How do we remain present to God?

Being present: an evolving liturgy

This August my buzz word is 'presence'.  It's been on my mind.  I forget about it for a few days, maybe even a week, then something I read, pray or hear sparks the thread of 'present' thought back to life... Usually when such words and ideas persist like this it's a good idea for me to pay attention; I may be about to learn something...

It's amazing how a word evolves in our understanding and association.  For years of my life, to be present was to be in attendance at school,

"Carla Trundle"
"Present Miss"

It's also true that those seven little letters have represented gifts given and received.  In the last decade however the word presence has become inextricably linked in my mind with God and prayer.  It's not a new idea, (in fact it's as ancient as Eden) but I know it's key to greater quality in my relationship with Jesus...

We all have our little mantras, personal and informal liturgies that pepper our prayer lives.  A recent but persistent addition to my prayer vocabulary has been,

"Lord, make your presence felt."  

I've prayed it over my own life as well as over people, places and situations.  I quite deliberately used this line to replace my prayer of "Come, Lord." For no other reason than it struck me that He's already here; He's already everywhere. It's not His presence we're lacking, but an awareness of it.  

This idea grew.  I thought about it... then prayed it... then thought about it some more. Now I'm realising that my prayer mantra may be evolving again... I still want God to make His presence known, but I'm wondering if in most circumstances I'm approaching presence from the wrong direction.  A few weeks ago I found myself scribbling this prayer in my journal...

"Help me to live present to you."

I stared at those words... then I went over and over them in pen until they jumped out amid a page of scribbled prayers.  It felt like a break through, an epiphany.  Something I've always known but needed to recognise.  I thought back to the times in my 20s when God has felt distant and for most of them I realised that it wasn't His presence but mine that was the challenge...

Today I'm thinking about distraction, and wakefulness, and awareness.  How do I remain in attendance to God?  How do I give myself as a gift to the gift maker?

I guess it's what Brother Lawrence was getting at all those years ago, but I had to rearrange His sentence, His sentiment, the title of His writings to really get what he did.  Anyone got any ideas or tried any similar prayer experiments?  How do we remain present to God?

Suggestions please: things to do before I'm 30!

OK, I may have left this one a little late but today, with just 3 days left before I turn 30, I began to wonder if there are things I should do before I'm no longer 20something. 30 doesn't freak me out (feel like I'm catching up with most of my mates) but I have loved my 20s and fancy doing something to commemorate such a brilliant ten years.  My only challenge is I've lived a rather full decade... I have travelled extensively, fallen in love, eaten well, had many adventures and become the lead singer of a band!  What's left? I'm struggling to come up with anything achievable.

So, your suggestions are very welcome.  I have 3 days and I want a few new things to commemorate the end of one decade and the beginning of the next.  I have a three criteria:

1. They must be legal
2. They must be achievable (flights abroad are out)
3. They must be affordable

I promise to provide photographic eveidence if I take on your suggestion/challenge.  Let the fun begin!

Super 8: Genius or Nostalgia?

There are certain films that have a higher status in my affections than they truly deserve.  Films that transcend their script, the actors, the cinematography and score to take on a life, an ascociation, that wraps them a warm and fuzzy glow.  Tales like The Goonies, Flight of the Navigater, Batteries Not Included, Space Camp, E.T. (I could go on) are firmly in this exclusive club of well loved adventures and many of them still feature in my DVD collection.  Watching them is more than just revisiting a tale, or laughing at the changes in fashion/acting/special affects; it's a trip down memory lane to a youth that I may have only lived in my memory.

Truthfully they each have a few things in common.  They are most definitely young at heart even when the protagonists are not young in age.  There is an optomism and hope to them that treads dangerously close to denial.  They explore everyday themes we can relate to in the context of fantastical adventures: family, change, friendship, self worth and community, to name just a few.  And, I always believe I could be right there with them; every one of these films has invaded my dreams.

Could I be adding to a film to the list?

As the lights came up at the end of our recent viewing of the new J J Abrams and Steven Spielberg film Super 8... all themes, and 'golden glow' indicaters were present and accounted for.  Did we just witness a modern classic in the making, or was Super 8 simply a derivative period drama?

Caught between the inocence of childhood and the great abiss of adulthood, five friends spend a summer making their own horror film.  As their project is derailed they soon realise they've been caught up in a real life terror, threatening their town.

All Spielberg and Abrams conventions are present and accounted for (daddy issues, optomism, innocence and growth - lens flare, mysterious beast, fantastical adventure and everyman leads), it's truly amazing to see two such distinct film making voices, harmonise so effectively.  This duet is by all accounts very successful.  Super 8 is a film with heart. I find this unsurprising as I am a fan of both directers/producers.  I grew up on a diet of Spielberg and will see anything he makes (or produces) and fell in love with Abrams imagination from Felicity, Alias and Lost onward.  So this pairing, it's fair to say, have a headstart in my estimation.

Super 8 is an elegant film.  The casting is fantastic (teenagers that actually look the age they're playing!), a near perfect script (there was one line towards the end where I shook my head), the pace is swift but not at the cost of establishing character, and the terror is very real.  What surprised me most was how genuinely scared I was watching it.  This isn't quite a kids film.  

Good friend, and decade long cinema buddy, Craig came to take my hubby out for breakfast this morning.  Our conversation, as it often does, turned to film.  "So, what did you think of Super 8?"  Together we debated whether the film is a classic in it's own standing, or whether it stands on the shoulders of those titans of cinema it references so playfully. It's a question worth asking.  There's no denying that the film intends a not to the greats, I'm sure it's a deliberate decision, but I wonder if that should detract from it's effectiveness?  No story exists in a vacume, and plenty have tried and made lesser films with as many homages.   

If you are yet to work it out, I cast my vote on the side of genius. Five stars for Super 8.  If I am taken in by a feeling of nostalgia, then I say hats off to Abrams and Speilberg, there's a certain kind of skill in that too.  I am curious about how someone younger who hasn't grown up with the stories of my youth will take to it though.  If you were ignorant of the sub-genre it flows from, would you still walk away with that fuzzy glow?

Seen the movie. What do you think?

Externally processing/praying

Sometimes I don't realise I've learned a thing until I start writing about it.  That may sound a little odd but go with me.  I had this article to write for 24-7 Prayer the last couple of weeks and if I'm honest the challenge totally daunted me: 800 words on 'How to Pray for Your Nation'.  Yikes!  I was very tempted to delegate to a wiser member of my prayer team, but a niggling voice in the back of my head told me I should give it a go... I may surprise myself...  

After a prolonged period of writers block, last week's riots here in the UK prompted a torrent of ideas.  As I actually prayed for England I had one of those 'oh yeah!' moments as I examined my own prayers.  I guess I've learned a lot from God and my friends in this global prayer movement, much without consciously realising it.  As I sat down to condense and refine the experience and lessons I had to share, it flowed relatively easy from heart, to mind, to fingers, to keyboard.  Check out my finished article here.