It's a fearsome thing to meet your match, as you stand toe to toe with your nemesis and reach down into the depths of who you are, deciding how far you will go to defeat her! "Who", you may ask, "deserves such a title." Well she was blonde, pug faced and about five foot high, yes my Nemesis is 10, but don't judge me till you hear the truth...
Today my lovely younger brother Adam is 17 years old! This weekend Steve and I made for Grendon ready to celebrate, gifts in hand. Secretly relieved that Adam's first choice of paintballing wasn't possible (I had a horrible vision of Dec blinding Ant in Bikergrove, his head tipped back, his face contorted in pain, screaming as the sight was burned from his eyes...) and jovially looked forward to the much less painful option of Laser Quest.
Fantasies of secretly being an awesome soldier, genetically engineered to reach my potential age 24, i.e. suddenly get really good at pretending to shoot people fell flat on it's face as my worst fears were confirmed. I'm a lover not a fighter.
Try as I might I just couldn't stop getting shot, very annoying. It was amongst this frenetic scramble in the dark that I came face to stomach with my Nemesis. I was launching my attack on the red base when out of no where came this midget 10 year old who shot me. Fair enough, that's what she's supposed to do. I'm not a sore loser, the frustration came when she followed me around shooting me everytime my pack powered back to life. She had the most evil gleem in her eye and when I protested she shot me once more and with a flick of her head declared, "I can do this all day". I had to run to get away from her. Truly humiliating.
Thankfully I had a chance to exact my revenge (trust me she deserved it). Sadly I couldn't find it in myself to kick her (which would have been so satisfying) instead she gave me the opportunity whilst I was acting all sniper like defending the yellow base in the second game.
As I saw that familiar strutt in her red flashing lights I knew this was my chance. As she launched her attack on my position I leaped from the shadows to annialate her. She stamped her foot in frustration and stood there for two minutes glaring at me as I killed her everytime she powered back to life. "What are you doing!?" She half screamed in frustration, to which I replied "I can do this all day" with a toss of my hair as she stomped off in a huff.
I triumphed!
Steve tried to point out that a Nemesis should be my equal and oposite and I hastened to point out how aweful I am at Laser Quest, in that environment it's every woman for herself.
Thanks Adam for a brilliant weekend. I loved hanging out and catching up. Your Captain Vontrapp is coming along very nicely! I love you very much my handsome 17 year old bro xc